“Love” is reserved for how we feel or act towards God and others.

“Like” is a much more flexible word, and can be used for hobbies, sports, food, and clothing choices.  So I “love” my wife, but I “like” college football.  We “love” our kids, but we “like” playing games together.

Our kids have caught on, and they have caught me.  I’ve said after a great meal, “Honey, I loved the spicy beef” – and all three kids are quick to say, “Dad, don’t you mean you ‘liked’ the beef?”

In other words, we are protective of the word “love” in our home.  And so is God.  For God so “loved” the world (John 3:16).  As His children, we are all to live a “life of love” and give ourselves fully to God and one another (Ephesians 5:1-2).

Whom do you love the most?  How do you show your preference, your loyalty, your investment, your most-meaningful affections toward them?

As followers of Jesus, it’s tragic when we allow the “minors” (like preferences, opinions, lesser issues) to rule over the “majors” (like your relationship with God, your spouse, your kids, your parents, your closest loved ones).

For example, your wife is more important than your sports addiction.  Your husband is more important than your obsession with a clean and organized home.  Your children are more important and worthy of your focus than finishing that project around the house.  Your parents are more important than watching television.  Some things deserve your love, and some just don’t.

Would you join us in evaluating how you talk about love?  Perhaps we could make that word mean something again, and be protective and intentional about this most powerful word.  “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity” (Colossians 3:14).

Love matters most to God, and it should matter most to us!

The book makes the thoughtful and helpful point that parenting is a journey of faith.  While we are loving and teaching and protecting and providing for our children, God is loving and teaching and going to work in our own lives.

It’s true.  So many times, things I have experienced as a Father or parent have brought to mind the tremendous role and movement of my Heavenly Father in my own life.  God is always at work, even in the pain.

The author challenges the notion and all-too-common tendencies of parents to “coddle” and “provide” for their children in extravagant ways.

We want our kids to be safe.

We want our kids to be happy.

We want our kids to like us.

We want our kids to have what we had (or didn’t have).

We want our kids to feel accepted at all times.

We want our kids to be special (at the expense, sometimes, of other kids.)

Are any of these things we desire for our kids actually going to help our kids mature and learn about life in the real world?

Are these desires tied more to what we want than what our kids actually need?

Are these the kinds of promises and efforts God guarantees for His children?

Or is there something more to this?  Something lasting and worth fighting for.  Something difficult and yet worthy of our endurance and sacrifice.  Something painful yet ultimately strengthening and character-forming.

In other words, are we parenting for temporary comfort or for long-lasting character?

Are we parenting to avoid pain or to embrace it and learn from it?

Are our efforts to protect and provide actually filled with fear, cowardice, and a self-centered desire to insulate ourselves from real world challenges?

Yep, it’s a great book – again.  If you want to read it along with me, let me know!

Wilson is one of the young adult leaders in our partner church in El Salvador!

Last April’s visit to El Salvador made an impression on me that I didn’t expect.  I wasn’t sure what to expect, actually!  With our church’s “Hand in Hand” schools in Africa, I experienced a world of emotions and observations about the impact of physical and spiritual poverty on our world.

Too often, my North American eyes are insulated from the kind of suffering that people are facing today.  The Central African Republic has a powerful grip on my heart, and I thank God that our church has been able to partner with Project Hope & Charite’ for several years there.

With the new “Church-to-Church” partnership in El Salvador, we hope to connect many more of our people with this kind of experience, this kind of friendship, and this kind of compassionate work of God.  In Eastern El Salvador, our partner church faces challenges regarding economic hardship, gangs and drugs, and even extreme weather.  Just a few months ago, thousands of people were literally chased out of their homes due to many days of flooding rain.

In April, our church will send twelve people on a missions and discovery trip to El Salvador.  I couldn’t be more thrilled with the team God is putting together here.  Led by Dave and Esther Pacheco, our team also includes RC & Deana Arsenau, Jordan Emmons, Shelly Ward, Jami Hinson, Fred Durant, Kim Mengerink, Billie Lang, Derek Hunt, and um, me.   If you’re interested in following the partnership we’re building with the Church of God, Springs of Eternal Life in El Salvador, check out our blog – grace2es.wordpress.com!

- Communication is HUGE.  In every family, organization, or team, it’s great to have a regularly scheduled sit-down with everybody on the team.  Some things are better announced in person like this, where people can ask questions or process out loud.

- Listen up! – Some of us, whether by personality or by role, find ourselves talking a lot.  Mea culpa on this one.  The phrase, “I’m sorry – you were saying…” came out a couple of times after I realized I had interrupted someone else.  Every person on the team appreciates the chance to be heard and participate in the discussion.

- Disagreement is Good – No joke.  Healthy teams can dialogue and disagree and learn from each other.  Today, we kicked around an issue in our discussion, and several came at the challenge from different angles.  It was good!  We need the freedom to disagree or at least voice differences and discuss.

- From “Me” to “We” – On a regular day, I get the privilege of working with some pretty wonderful people.  Each one seems to really love God and really love the church.  They bring their “A-game” to life and ministry, and not just on Sundays.  Though I certainly bring my own ideas and agenda for the meeting, I love being a part of a “WE” (team) that works together for good, and the “ME” grows in the process.

At times, I love reading and teaching through a book of the Bible (like Titus or Ephesians or Habakkuk).  But there are certain times where you really have to focus a Sunday (or series of Sundays) on unpacking real-life topics from a Biblical point of view.

Each week during the “Things We Don’t Talk About” series, our hope was to cover key passages or thoughts from Scripture on that issue or category from Genesis to Revelation.  Week 3 felt like a true Biblical Theology on Sex.  Week 5 unpacked a Biblical invitation and response to our failures.

On a personal level, if you’re seeking to draw close to God, then you can expect growth in spiritual life and every other area.

Last night, we read Jesus’ greatest commandment to our kids at home – “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind…”

Well, heart, soul and mind leaves no part of my life untouched by the grace and truth of God.  Can’t hide past pain.  Can’t cover up family feuds.  Can’t stuff sexual frustrations somewhere that God won’t see.  Can’t say I love God and then ignore Him every time I use money.

All of these are great areas for discussion and reflection in light of God’s love and God’s truth.  And there are so many more areas to cover!  Perhaps one day there will be a sequel series…

Until then, everything should be fair game.  Let’s talk about it in church – with grace and truth – and become a people who recognize how much God loves and forgives us – to the point that we love and accept and forgive one another no matter what.

Does God care who wins a football game?  Should pro athletes proclaim their faith to the world?  How should a follower of Jesus express appreciation for sports stars?

I am a follower of Jesus Christ.  You could also call me a football fan.

I love the Bible and I love the Church.  You could also catch me watching a game and talking about strategy, playcalling, and the depth chart.

So when somehow, faith and football collide, it’s fascinating to me.  Christians in America feel excitement and admiration when a well-known athlete speaks positively about God.

Just look at the shelves of a Christian bookstore, where you’ll find books by football coaches (Joe Gibbs, Tony Dungy, Gene Chizik, and yes, Tress).  You’ll find books by current and former NFL players from all over the country (Shaun Alexander, Colt McCoy, Drew Brees, and yes, Tebow).

Should football heroes somehow double as spiritual leaders?  Are their lives worth following and observing off the field?  Should we read their books?

With Tim Tebow, we seem to have a young man with a faith and maturity beyond his years.  In 2011, the term “Tebowing” came to describe the act of bowing, praying, and showing loyalty to God in Heaven.  Tim’s faith in God seems to give strength and purpose to everything he does and says.  Though His clearly-professed love for Jesus Christ is criticized everywhere from SportsCenter to water coolers across America, He seems content to praise God regardless.

Tebow has clearly said he doesn’t believe God cares or decides the outcome of a football game.  But God clearly inspires this tough, unrefined quarterback to keep playing hard, always believe you can win, and pump up your teammates!

When Christians speak out about faith and attempt to live for God in the midst of public scrutiny, we should pray for strength and protection and perseverance.  You can root for Tebow to lead another game-winning comeback, but let’s also pray for God to use Tim’s life to inspire others.  Tebow’s pedestal is temporary, but Christ’s is forever.

With Jim Tressel, we have one of the most outspoken Christian coaches in recent memory.  But in 2011, Ohio State’s beloved Coach Tressel was indeed revealed as a less-than-perfect leader.  Yes, Ohio, even Jim Tressel has sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

Though he had given speeches and written books on faith and integrity, Coach Tressel made costly mistakes that hurt Ohio State and cost him his job.

Since the scandal, critics of Ohio State and of Christianity were quick to bash Tressel’s testimony or mock his life lessons and write them off as self-righteous propaganda.

I don’t remember Coach Tressel ever making a heart-felt apology or explanation about falling short and making mistakes and asking forgiveness.   Once a model for Christian loyalty and integrity, Coach Tressel could one day be a model of repentance, forgiveness, and dependence on God’s mercy.

I hope we haven’t seen the last of Coach Tressel, nor heard the last about God’s work in His life.  Coach said a lot of things about persevering through life’s trials, and he has the chance to experience that.  Tressel’s pedestal was temporary, but Christ’s is forever.

As we close the books on 2011, Christian sports fans will never forget what we’ve seen from Jim Tressel and Tim Tebow.  Two men who were not ashamed to give voice to their Christian beliefs.

For a time, though not being perfect, these men acknowledged that only Jesus Christ deserved the spotlight.  Sports figures (or any other human beings) are only worth following or imitating so long as they say, with the Apostle Paul, “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Jesus Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1).

Tressel will always be remembered as a great coach who loved Ohio State.   Tebow may one day be remembered as the underdog who led his team to greatness.

Football is great fun, and quite an escape from our daily stresses.  Root for your favorite team or player, but don’t expect perfection.  Don’t put men on any pedestal.  Don’t think Tebow is as great as some say, nor Tress as bad as some say.  We all desperately need and depend on Jesus Christ as our forgiver, our leader, and our Savior.   Look at Him.  Read about His life.  Start acting like Him.  Praise Him.  Talk about Him more.  He’s our Hero.

Finally, we put Christmas lights up over the front of our house.  Lights on the garage.  Lights on the bushes.  Lights on the window.  Lights around the bricks surrounding the bushes.

I had a great time “bonding” with our son, Luke, who “helped” me stretch out the lights and plug them in.  We didn’t mind the cold, you see, we were putting up the lights – a tested-by-time Christmas tradition.

One day later, I’ve got four random thoughts about our moment together, hanging up the lights…

(1) The Light – the deepest meaning behind Christmas lights is that Jesus Christ was (and is) the “Light of the World” as He claimed to be in John 8:12-20.  Remember that our world can be a dark place… where wars continue and criminals go free and money equals power.

(2) The Cold – our bad.  We waited until 12/11 to put our lights up.  It was cold out.  Still, the lights must shine.  In our neighborhood, in December, no matter the temperature.

(3) The Trash – we found several entire strings of lights that didn’t work at all.  Good for nothing.  Our Julie (age 3) had fun yelling, “THEY ARE TRASH!!  YOU ARE TRASH, lights!”

(4) The Family – it was great to be together, doing a project, getting ready for Christmas.  I’m reading a book about Parenting that has repeatedly challenged me to enjoy and create moments like this.  Kids won’t always want to help Dad and Mom with projects in the front yard, will they?

We still have more lights to hang up, maybe today.  Hopefully again, a traditional Christmas “task” will mean so much more to me, to my family, and to our neighborhood.

Rocket science, I know.

What friendships are you investing in?  What people are a priority for you to get to know, encourage, and enjoy time with?

If you’re an extrovert, you can tend to be friendly with everybody and yet friends with nobody.

If you’re an introvert, you… well… might enjoy doing things alone or in the safe friendships you already have.

I find that I bounce between those two extremes.

Sometimes I love being around people and laughing and talking and connecting.  Other times, I know I need to be alone to “recharge.”

This morning, I’m getting together with a group of pastor-friends for brunch.  A few years ago, I didn’t know most of them.  Now, I’m grateful for this company of friends.  It’s taken time, but thanks to our once-a-month commitment to getting together, we’ve grown a sense of familiarity and friendship that we didn’t have before.

If someone is important to you, make time for them.  Make the effort.  Don’t wait for someone else to step up and pursue you as a friend – take the initiative to build a friendship today.  Over time, you’ll be grateful for the friendships and memories that emerge.

Off to brunch!

We named the first one Susan… and our female frog is twice the size of the male frog, which is normal.

We named the second one “El Sapo,” which is Spanish for “the frog.”

Well, the other night, “El Sapo” floated to the bottom of the tank, lifeless.  We tried to revive him.  Susan tried to confront him.

She really did.

That’s right, our female frog sat beside her “once-living” friend and put her froggy arms around him.  It was surreal.  There’s a part of death where we experience the pain and emptiness of love that is lost.

Our kids grieved.  Allie, our 7-year-old, cried for what seemed like an eternity.

A few days later, we held a burial moment for “El Sapo” in the backyard.  It was our family’s way of saying goodbye and giving thanks for a good pet.  There’s a part of death where we need to be together, to acknowledge the realities, and to get some closure.

At some point, owning these frogs is a chance to teach skills for life, emotion, and grief to our kids in the context of faith, hope, and love.

So we buried our frog.

And in a few weeks, we’ll get another frog.  There’s a part of death where eventually, with the help of God and others, our wounded heart moves on and learns to open up and love all over again.

Simply unforgettable, so why not blog about it?

Yeah, I know it was 19.5 years ago.  1992.  Right after the fall of Communism.  Russia was very open and interested in America’s culture and faith and resources.

So I joined a team at The Chapel called “Operation Doulos.”  We planned and prayed.  We learned some basic Russian.  I watched Rocky IV again.  LOL.  We did some basic training on serving and helping in cross-cultural settings.  We raised support for the costs of the trip.

For about 8 days or so, my friends and I were in Russia and Ukraine.

I’ll never forget our first day, passing out hundreds of Bibles in Red Square.  For a country that once (and sometimes still) opposed Christianity, it was crazy to see literally hundreds of people asking for Bibles or literature from America.

I’ll never forget our last day, saying emotional goodbyes to wonderful families and believers we met in Ukraine, who opened up their homes, churches, and lives to us in so many ways.

I’ll never forget Ginnadey Medvedev, the father in my host home, who was a retired communist soldier now serving as a full-time deacon at his church while running a small business.

I’ll never forget Tom and Marcia Bennardo, Tony and Dolores Kijanko, and Dave and Guida Sweitzer.  The amazing adult leaders who carried the burden of coaching, encouraging, and protecting us on that remarkable journey.

So here’s to Russia – a blast from the past when we didn’t have blogs or even the Internet.

And if you get the chance to travel to a faraway place as part of a team that wants to encourage others and make a difference somewhere else in the world, don’t you dare pass that up!