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It’s Wednesday.

Usually for me, that means a few meetings at work or meetings with friends from our church or community.

I enjoy the one-on-one meetings where I can really hear a person’s heart or what they are going through.  I also appreciate the chance to learn from someone else and soak in what I can.  The time can fly, but I enjoy the chance to connect, to encourage, to be encouraged, to listen, and to learn.

I like the group meetings – our church staff meets today at 10:00AM.  Pray for us if you feel like it.  This time is nearly always great for brainstorming, praying together, talking about what’s going on here at Grace, and “game-planning” for the next week or month.  We are blessed to have a team of people who really love what they do – we love investing in people!  We love seeing God go to work in the hearts, lives, schedules, families, and decisions of people connected to our church.

Perhaps your Wednesday is “hump day,” and you’re thinking about just getting through the week.  Or not losing your mind or energy in the midst of back to school chaos.

For at least this day, I relish the priceless opportunity to invest in others.  To listen more than I talk.  To build up rather than tear down.  To encourage rather than criticize.  To understand and notice rather than rush past.

I’ve heard it said that your life is the sum total of your relationships and what you make of them.  Well, I’ve been blessed to have some wonderful people invest in my life – and so have you!  Let’s make this day… this “hump day” Wednesday… about encouraging and investing in the people and relationships closest to you.

I don’t know about your home… or your job… or your life…

But I do know about mine.  About ours.

This week was “back to school” for our family and many people in our neighborhood, and I welcome it.

As much as I love the weather and the break and the family freedoms that come with summer break, I am looking forward to the routine.  To a schedule.  To some tremendous things that happen when we connect with others – like school, church, home group, sporting events, and the like.

Allison started third grade yesterday.

Luke started first grade… and signed up for flag football.  Booyah!

Julie started… well… her last year at home with Mommy.  She’s going to get some focused love, training, and discipline while Jennie enjoys Julie’s precious last pre-school year.

In the midst of the routine, we are setting out to protect our family time.  To communicate better.  To seize moments together and protect family dinners.  To make “connecting” a part of our daily family routine.

What routines or habits do you have?  Are you excited about this new “school year”?  What decisions about time or relationships are most important for you to keep?

Part of my daily routine – lately – has been to read Proverbs.  The first seven savory “verses” are all about developing what God calls “a disciplined and prudent life.”  As we all get back into the “swing of things” (whatever that means for you), make sure that your routines serve to improve your faith, your family, and your life.

Don’t let the routines strangle or bore the life out of you.  Your habits and schedules should help you, not hinder you!  At their best, our routines can help us rally around the priorities and people God has placed in our lives – and make the most of them.

In our family, we have successfully taught our children the difference between the words “love” and “like.”

“Love” is reserved for how we feel or act towards God and others.

“Like” is a much more flexible word, and can be used for hobbies, sports, food, and clothing choices.  So I “love” my wife, but I “like” college football.  We “love” our kids, but we “like” playing games together.

Our kids have caught on, and they have caught me.  I’ve said after a great meal, “Honey, I loved the spicy beef” – and all three kids are quick to say, “Dad, don’t you mean you ‘liked’ the beef?”

In other words, we are protective of the word “love” in our home.  And so is God.  For God so “loved” the world (John 3:16).  As His children, we are all to live a “life of love” and give ourselves fully to God and one another (Ephesians 5:1-2).

Whom do you love the most?  How do you show your preference, your loyalty, your investment, your most-meaningful affections toward them?

As followers of Jesus, it’s tragic when we allow the “minors” (like preferences, opinions, lesser issues) to rule over the “majors” (like your relationship with God, your spouse, your kids, your parents, your closest loved ones).

For example, your wife is more important than your sports addiction.  Your husband is more important than your obsession with a clean and organized home.  Your children are more important and worthy of your focus than finishing that project around the house.  Your parents are more important than watching television.  Some things deserve your love, and some just don’t.

Would you join us in evaluating how you talk about love?  Perhaps we could make that word mean something again, and be protective and intentional about this most powerful word.  “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity” (Colossians 3:14).

Love matters most to God, and it should matter most to us!

This week, I started reading Sacred Parenting by Gary Thomas.  I remember reading through it in 2003 and 2004, shortly before Allison was born.

The book makes the thoughtful and helpful point that parenting is a journey of faith.  While we are loving and teaching and protecting and providing for our children, God is loving and teaching and going to work in our own lives.

It’s true.  So many times, things I have experienced as a Father or parent have brought to mind the tremendous role and movement of my Heavenly Father in my own life.  God is always at work, even in the pain.

The author challenges the notion and all-too-common tendencies of parents to “coddle” and “provide” for their children in extravagant ways.

We want our kids to be safe.

We want our kids to be happy.

We want our kids to like us.

We want our kids to have what we had (or didn’t have).

We want our kids to feel accepted at all times.

We want our kids to be special (at the expense, sometimes, of other kids.)

Are any of these things we desire for our kids actually going to help our kids mature and learn about life in the real world?

Are these desires tied more to what we want than what our kids actually need?

Are these the kinds of promises and efforts God guarantees for His children?

Or is there something more to this?  Something lasting and worth fighting for.  Something difficult and yet worthy of our endurance and sacrifice.  Something painful yet ultimately strengthening and character-forming.

In other words, are we parenting for temporary comfort or for long-lasting character?

Are we parenting to avoid pain or to embrace it and learn from it?

Are our efforts to protect and provide actually filled with fear, cowardice, and a self-centered desire to insulate ourselves from real world challenges?

Yep, it’s a great book – again.  If you want to read it along with me, let me know!

This past Sunday, we wrapped up a sermon series at church entitled, “Things We Don’t Talk About in Church.”  For five weeks, we covered issues with our past, our families, our sexuality, our money, and our failures.  It was great to dig into these issues on Sundays and then process them with people throughout the week.  Our staff and elders and many others enjoyed some fruitful conversation and also some much-needed times of prayer.

At times, I love reading and teaching through a book of the Bible (like Titus or Ephesians or Habakkuk).  But there are certain times where you really have to focus a Sunday (or series of Sundays) on unpacking real-life topics from a Biblical point of view.

Each week during the “Things We Don’t Talk About” series, our hope was to cover key passages or thoughts from Scripture on that issue or category from Genesis to Revelation.  Week 3 felt like a true Biblical Theology on Sex.  Week 5 unpacked a Biblical invitation and response to our failures.

On a personal level, if you’re seeking to draw close to God, then you can expect growth in spiritual life and every other area.

Last night, we read Jesus’ greatest commandment to our kids at home – “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind…”

Well, heart, soul and mind leaves no part of my life untouched by the grace and truth of God.  Can’t hide past pain.  Can’t cover up family feuds.  Can’t stuff sexual frustrations somewhere that God won’t see.  Can’t say I love God and then ignore Him every time I use money.

All of these are great areas for discussion and reflection in light of God’s love and God’s truth.  And there are so many more areas to cover!  Perhaps one day there will be a sequel series…

Until then, everything should be fair game.  Let’s talk about it in church – with grace and truth – and become a people who recognize how much God loves and forgives us – to the point that we love and accept and forgive one another no matter what.

 Yesterday, our family spent some time outdoors in cold central Ohio.  We put the final touches on some yard work and went for a walk.

Finally, we put Christmas lights up over the front of our house.  Lights on the garage.  Lights on the bushes.  Lights on the window.  Lights around the bricks surrounding the bushes.

I had a great time “bonding” with our son, Luke, who “helped” me stretch out the lights and plug them in.  We didn’t mind the cold, you see, we were putting up the lights – a tested-by-time Christmas tradition.

One day later, I’ve got four random thoughts about our moment together, hanging up the lights…

(1) The Light – the deepest meaning behind Christmas lights is that Jesus Christ was (and is) the “Light of the World” as He claimed to be in John 8:12-20.  Remember that our world can be a dark place… where wars continue and criminals go free and money equals power.

(2) The Cold – our bad.  We waited until 12/11 to put our lights up.  It was cold out.  Still, the lights must shine.  In our neighborhood, in December, no matter the temperature.

(3) The Trash – we found several entire strings of lights that didn’t work at all.  Good for nothing.  Our Julie (age 3) had fun yelling, “THEY ARE TRASH!!  YOU ARE TRASH, lights!”

(4) The Family – it was great to be together, doing a project, getting ready for Christmas.  I’m reading a book about Parenting that has repeatedly challenged me to enjoy and create moments like this.  Kids won’t always want to help Dad and Mom with projects in the front yard, will they?

We still have more lights to hang up, maybe today.  Hopefully again, a traditional Christmas “task” will mean so much more to me, to my family, and to our neighborhood.

Building a friendship takes time and effort.

Rocket science, I know.

What friendships are you investing in?  What people are a priority for you to get to know, encourage, and enjoy time with?

If you’re an extrovert, you can tend to be friendly with everybody and yet friends with nobody.

If you’re an introvert, you… well… might enjoy doing things alone or in the safe friendships you already have.

I find that I bounce between those two extremes.

Sometimes I love being around people and laughing and talking and connecting.  Other times, I know I need to be alone to “recharge.”

This morning, I’m getting together with a group of pastor-friends for brunch.  A few years ago, I didn’t know most of them.  Now, I’m grateful for this company of friends.  It’s taken time, but thanks to our once-a-month commitment to getting together, we’ve grown a sense of familiarity and friendship that we didn’t have before.

If someone is important to you, make time for them.  Make the effort.  Don’t wait for someone else to step up and pursue you as a friend – take the initiative to build a friendship today.  Over time, you’ll be grateful for the friendships and memories that emerge.

Off to brunch!

A few months ago, our family bought two African dwarf frogs.  Fresh water dwelling, easy-to-care-for frogs.

We named the first one Susan… and our female frog is twice the size of the male frog, which is normal.

We named the second one “El Sapo,” which is Spanish for “the frog.”

Well, the other night, “El Sapo” floated to the bottom of the tank, lifeless.  We tried to revive him.  Susan tried to confront him.

She really did.

That’s right, our female frog sat beside her “once-living” friend and put her froggy arms around him.  It was surreal.  There’s a part of death where we experience the pain and emptiness of love that is lost.

Our kids grieved.  Allie, our 7-year-old, cried for what seemed like an eternity.

A few days later, we held a burial moment for “El Sapo” in the backyard.  It was our family’s way of saying goodbye and giving thanks for a good pet.  There’s a part of death where we need to be together, to acknowledge the realities, and to get some closure.

At some point, owning these frogs is a chance to teach skills for life, emotion, and grief to our kids in the context of faith, hope, and love.

So we buried our frog.

And in a few weeks, we’ll get another frog.  There’s a part of death where eventually, with the help of God and others, our wounded heart moves on and learns to open up and love all over again.

Yep, I’m a soccer Dad.  Luke (age 5) is entering his second “season” of soccer this week.  Big debut later this week.

And somehow, I got the chance to be a “co-coach.”

Should be fun, except for two minor details:

(1) I never played organized soccer.  Well, unless you count gym class in 4th grade.

(2) I don’t really even like soccer.

Then again, I didn’t like horseradish until a few years ago.  Plus, if you can change, and Rocky Balboa can change, I guess anybody can change.

So I’m a “co-coach/Dad” on the Bishops.  Where it’s not about advanced soccer strategy, it’s about learning how to kick the ball.  It’s not about trying to be the next David Beckham or even the next David Ward – it’s about having fun out there on the field.  It’s not about shouting “GOOOOOOOOOOOOAL” every time you score and rubbing it in the other team’s faces – it’s about the excitement on my son’s face when I yell “water break” or “snack time.”

It’s about being a kid and enjoying all of it.

Somehow, it’s even more about being a Daddy and loving my boy.

This blog entry is short.

Recently, a friend told me that my blog entries are too long.

He’s right.

We need friends like that – who say the truth we need to hear.

Say the truth, and say it like you care. Short and sweet.

I eat that stuff up.

Like a strawberry dipped in dark chocolate.